Hi, I am Jackie.
Professionally, I am a certified speech language therapist with 11 years of experience in the early childhood / early intervention field. As a budding therapist, I faced difficulties in "getting" some children to "cooperate" during therapy. During meet-the-parents sessions, many parents were at a loss of how to get their child to comply and behave. They have more questions about behavioural management than about their child's speech and language development. Curious, I did some research. It was then I discovered the realm of respectful/gentle/conscious parenting/discipline. I was absolutely blown away by this radical way of guiding children.
That was the start of my passion for children's social-emotional development.
I dove into absorbing all the books/articles/podcasts I could on this topic. I soaked up the pedagogy teachings of RIE, read books by Janet Lansbury, Alfie Kohn, etc. That was in 2013.
It took another 2 years of self-learning for me to feel confident enough to share my knowledge at the early intervention centre I work with. I was nervous, because this way of discipline is so different from how most teachers discipline in the classroom. The sharing was well-received. With that initial buy-in from middle management, my next hurdle was the upper management.
In 2017, we partnered with Chapter Zero to run the inaugural Respectful Discipline workshop for all 100+ staff. It is that same year we officially adopted Respectful Discipline in our guidance and discipline policy.
Needless to say, I was thrilled. That was one of the highlights in my career. To bring this knowledge to 100+ staff across 4 early intervention centres in Singapore, positively impacting 700+ children. (Shumei, Michelle, Vicky, Kristin.... thank you for blazing the trail with me!)
In 2019, I became a mum! And despite having 6 years of experience practicing gentle discipline with my students, parenting was no bed of roses for me. It is a humbling experience; I can now empathize the struggles my students' parents go through.
As a therapist, I was pretty darn good at settings limits and seeking the kids' cooperation. But as a parent, I find myself re-reading the most fundamental books on positive discipline and STILL finding gems in them. Re-reading them helps me to truly embody the spirit of gentle discipline
It's much easier to deal with my other people's children students as compared to my own. My own child brings my childhood wounds to the surface again. And now I have two choices: to impose my will on my child, or do the work to address my ego stories.
With my ever-growing knowledge about inner child work and re-parenting ourselves as adults, I have something unique to offer in this area of respectful discipline. I see that it's beyond just saying/doing specific phrases/actions to the child, the key is to look into ourselves PLUS an understanding of children social-emotional development.
I hope to help parents and educators see children with new lens. To understand them from a developmental viewpoint. To parent and guide children from compassion, not merely repeating how they were being parented by their own parents. I hope that this generation of children will be children who don't have to cry alone.